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“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.”  – Ecclesiastes 3:1

More than 15 years ago I met Roger North for breakfast. I knew Roger from his board appointment with Family Service where I had spent over 20 years of my work life. Since I was looking for a new place to use my understanding of how family dynamics impact family-owned businesses, I wanted to hear about Roger’s vocational journey and how he came to start North Group Consultants.

Several months later I learned from Bill Poole that Roger was hiring another consultant. He suggested I give Roger a call. The rest is history.

How does one summarize 15 plus years of meaningful work? So many good memories. So many people to thank. The opportunity to experience an organization like North Group that actually lives out its values has made me a better person. We aren’t perfect but we dare to have the hard conversations needed for a cohesive team.

I have had the privilege of relating to many business leaders who are committed to providing a workplace where people can thrive and grow. The following are some of the rewarding aspects of my work with these fine persons:

  • Helping entrepreneurs develop leadership teams in order to transition their company into the next generation
  • Assisting these same entrepreneurs in filling the void left after passing on their company to the next generation of leaders
  • Providing a safe place for young leaders to discuss their leadership journey and their quest to become better leaders—as well as better husbands, wives, fathers and mothers
  • Helping family members discover how their gifts can best be used in the family business

And now I am preparing for my own transition. Some call it retirement but I am calling it “the next chapter in my life”—one that will be enhanced because of the many positive relationships formed while serving North Group Consultants and our clients. After a six-week trip out west, I will continue to work part time for North Group while using my lighter schedule for additional time in Hilton Head, a bit more golf, and considerably more time with family and friends.

Prior to the Masters Golf Tournament an unscientific poll was taken that found Bubba Watson to be the PGA Tour golfer that other pros would be least likely to help in a parking lot fight. The poll was attempting to identify the least-liked male professional golfer.

When Bubba was asked what he thought of the outcome of the poll his response was: “I take it as I need to improve as a man,” he said. “It’s a challenge. It’s great. I’m glad that it came out, and it’s going to help me improve. So if it’s a bad thing, and people don’t like me, then I’ve got to improve and prove them wrong.”

At North Group we don’t try to help companies discover who is least liked. What we do help leaders with, at times, is discovering how others view their leadership abilities. And, it can be an intimidating experience.

I once had a mentor suggest that whenever I am tempted to discount negative comments someone offers me, I should look for the grain of truth that exists.

Are you open to feedback about yourself that might feel negative? Or, do you allow your ego to stand in the way of self-improvement?

December 5, 2014

Leadership Takes Courage by Dennis Clemmer

In October I took part in my high school’s 50th class reunion. I wasn’t sure what to expect and even had some troubling dreams prior to the event. My dreams were not realized, however, and the event was a huge success. All because of courage.

Between my sophomore and junior year, Dave, a classmate, was killed in a trucking accident. Jane, his girlfriend and classmate, was devastated by the tragedy. I remember how sad the viewing and funeral were for all of us who knew Dave. When school started a week later there were no guidance counselors waiting for us. Life was expected to go on as usual.

Now, 50 plus years later, Jane, who was responsible for planning much of our reunion, kicked off the Saturday events by inviting us to a memorial garden on the school’s campus that she had helped develop. That morning, as we classmates and spouses gathered together in a circle, Jane shared her long grief journey and then gave the rest of us permission to revisit and share our stories since graduation. This time of healing and listening and yes, crying together, bonded us in a way that’s difficult to put into words. It was profound.

For me, the courage of this class leader set the tone for the whole day. Instead of just reporting on academic degrees and accomplishments, we ended up having deeply meaningful conversations about things that really mattered.

Jane’s courage and willingness to be transparent reminded me that we business leaders, if we are willing to be courageous and real during difficult times, can help create a climate among employees that encourages respect, personal development and friendship—all ingredients that add meaning to life and, incidentally, help foster a healthy and productive business environment.

May 5, 2014

What Will They Say? by Dennis Clemmer

The call came mid afternoon, March 30, while playing cards with my elderly parents. Uncle Arlan, my father’s younger brother, had died earlier that morning. It was not an unexpected call as we had learned several weeks earlier that he was in the last stages of life due to kidney cancer.

Since the funeral would be in Texas I was initially inclined not to attend. But after learning that the services would be delayed to accommodate a grandchild who was coming from Africa, I was able to rearrange my schedule and go. I had not seen my two cousins in over 25 years and, from past experience, knew that showing up for such an occasion was not only deeply appreciated by the family but also beneficial for me.

I had seen Arlan infrequently during my adult years since he and Jody had located in Texas many years ago after his time in military service. But family visits and his keen interest in Clemmer genealogy brought us together every couple of years. During those times I was always impressed with his quiet, gentle spirit. Now I was to learn how this man impacted those around him.

Rev. Charlotte Coyle, who provided the eulogy, noted that Arlan had achieved the status of Master Barber at age 16, which served to set him on a path of excellence. She gave specific examples of this excellence:

  • A music and education degree coupled with an innate skill and passion that allowed him to teach school and be an excellent, effective teacher.
  • Leading the church choir and instilling in them the same passion for the music that he loved so well.
  • Volunteer work at the local hospital logging several thousand hours in a ministry of hospitality and helping others.

While I was impressed with these accomplishments, what really caught my attention were these words from Rev. Coyle, “He always was such a strong and gentle presence, wise and thoughtful, caring and kind, gracious and compassionate. He always was completely supportive of me—encouraging and appreciative and helpful. I have been immensely blessed to have had Arlan Clemmer in my life.”

Wow, what a compliment—“I have been immensely blessed to have had Arlan Clemmer in my life.”

As I sat and listened to Rev. Coyle it occurred to me that someday the service would be about me and the life I lived. What would they say about me? It is common to want to be remembered for accomplishments—achieving vocational success, serving on noteworthy community boards, belonging to prestigious clubs, obtaining educational degrees, etc. But I realized that what I most want is for them to be able to say, like they did for Uncle Arlan, “I have been blessed to have had Dennis Clemmer in my life.”

What would you like them to say about you?

 

November 5, 2013

Messy Business by Dennis Clemmer

I often don’t take time to read the alumni news publication I receive from my high school. But when the magazine arrived several months ago, something drew me to reading about the commencement address given by Andrew Huth, an editorial/documentary photographer located in Philadelphia.

Huth challenged the graduating seniors on the hard work of bringing about change, noting that to do so “we need to be intimately involved in the messy business of loving others.” The “messy business of loving others” … hmm.

Huth went on to say that he was challenged early in his career when he was harshly critiqued by a newspaper editor who noted that all of his pictures were taken with a long telephoto lens. “You’re far away from your subject in a lot of your pictures; you’re afraid to engage people,” he was told. Realizing that the critique was on target he began to take pictures with a 24mm lens that required him to get within arm’s length of his subjects.  “From that day forward, I never photographed anyone without first spending time talking with them, eating with them, walking with them and, most importantly, listening to them,” Huth told the students.

I found myself resonating with Huth’s comments as I am, by nature, someone who finds it easy to use distance in relationships. As the oldest in my family, with a handicapped sister born immediately after me, I learned to do things on my own and became quite comfortable functioning independently. But it also made me susceptible to keeping distance between myself and others. Engaging with others, for me, takes intentionality.

One of my observations in working with some business leaders is that taking a personal interest in those who report to them is not easy. While they might be comfortable talking with employees about work related issues, connecting on a personal level is a challenge. Asking an employee about what goes on in their lives outside of work feels nosy and intrusive so they don’t go there. Learning too much can result in encountering “messiness,” they believe.

How do you view business relationships? Are those you lead only of value for the skill sets they bring to your organization? Or, are you willing to risk some “messiness” in order to connect on a deeper level?

From my many business conversations over the past 13 years I have learned that employees do notice when you, the business leader, take time to know something about their personal lives. Connecting on a deeper level communicates to your people that you value them for who they are, not just for how they can advance the business. And that does make a difference!

April 6, 2013

Living Through Transitions by Dennis Clemmer

Transitions have been on my mind a lot recently, given several family events. Both of my daughters are pregnant, expecting to deliver daughters of their own this summer, two weeks apart. For Valerie and Gordon, this is their second child. Evan, our grandson, will turn three shortly after his sister is born. Tasha and Travis, for whom this is their first, have lived fairly carefree lives, enjoying outdoor activities such as rock climbing, snowboarding, hiking and traveling.

Inviting a new member into the home will require adjustments for both families. Evan, who has had the full attention of his parents, will now need to share that time with his little sister. Tasha and Travis will have to consider the well being of a little one before heading off to their adventures. We grandparents could be facing some adjustments of our own.

The other recent event in my family, bringing a less than happy reaction, was my brother’s unexpected loss of a job when his company downsized (shared with his permission). After 23 years of steady employment he now needs to look for work.

The past 12 plus years of working with companies going through transitions has offered me the opportunity to witness the challenges, opportunities and benefits of such changes. It has also offered me the opportunity to witness a wide variety of responses. For some it has been an invigorating, energizing experience resulting in a renewed sense of purpose. For others it has been an opportunity to explore unused skills. For still others it has been a gut wrenching time, leading to questions about self worth and vocational direction.

Transitions are emotional events. They force us to reach deep inside ourselves, and our reactions sometimes surprise us. What we envision as joyful transitions sometimes bring unexpected challenges. Changes we see as difficult sometimes bring pleasant benefits.

I first learned of my brother’s loss of employment through an email, but I really couldn’t determine how the news was affecting him. When I called him I was encouraged to hear him say that, while all of this had taken him by surprise, he was going to approach it as a chance to make a fresh start. He likened it to my attitude 13 years ago when I made a career change. Of course his transition was the greater challenge since it was forced upon him while mine was chosen.

So, what determines one’s ability to manage transitions gracefully? The following are attributes I have observed in others who have adjusted well:

  • Flexibility
  • Resilience
  • Patience
  • Open mindedness
  • Persistence

Developing these attributes will help prepare all of us for expected or unexpected transitions. What are you doing to foster these in your life?

January 4, 2013

Planning for Success by Dennis Clemmer

Three days from now Notre Dame and Alabama will be playing for the National Championship of college football. I am an avid fan of Notre Dame which doesn’t sit too well in this part of the country. But that is beside the point.

Recently I was reading an article about Notre Dames’ preparation for the game and a member of the team commented that their focus was on daily practice goals. In his view the accomplishment of the daily goals was instrumental in being successful on game day. Wishing or hoping they would win the game was not part of the strategy.

Obviously setting daily goals doesn’t guarantee a win as there are factors that are outside players’ control that may result in a less than desired outcome. Injuries would be one such factor. A key player being knocked out of a game can play a major factor in the outcome.

When I joined North Group I was challenged to set personal annual goals. I did so at first, more out of a desire to demonstrate my commitment to the group, than a belief that it was a useful discipline.

After 12 years of developing annual goals I have come to realize how doing so helps to structure my behavior during the course of the year. Since my goals are not just about what I want to accomplish within the business, they guide my activities related to spiritual development, family life, physical well being and leadership.

The December 27th Lancaster Newspaper devoted a section of the paper to personal fitness and the importance of setting goals for achieving this. One of the articles highlighted the issue of commitment/staying motivated. The personal fitness industry is well aware that follow through with goals set at the beginning of the year is a real challenge.

Staying focused on goals throughout the year happens best for me by meeting quarterly with an accountability partner. While I am somewhat embarrassed to acknowledge this, approval of someone I respect is a motivator and knowing that every three months I will be asked how I am doing keeps me actively working at the goals I set.

Developing annual goals for the past 12 years has taught me the following:

  • Setting goals in broad areas – spiritual development, family life, business, personal fitness and community service – keeps me from being one dimensional
  • Meeting with an accountability partner increases my level of self awareness and uncovers other areas of my life that need attention
  • Making corrections midyear for over ambitious goals is okay
  • What I learn in the process is of greater value than achieving the set goal

I challenge you this year to consider setting goals for yourself, finding an accountability partner and enjoying what the journey teaches you.

September 5, 2012

Living a Life of Purpose by Dennis Clemmer

I thought I had chosen my theme for this blog until I picked up the Perspective section of the August 26 Sunday News.

First, I read Joe Lapp’s article, “Living the Lessons of a Life Still Cherished.” The story is about Glen Lapp, Joe’s cousin, who was killed in Afghanistan in August 2010. Glen was serving on an 11-member medical team delivering medical aid to a remote mountain village when he was killed by militants in what Joe described as a “random act of war violence.”

What impacted me as much as Glen’s willingness to put himself in harm’s way was his quiet influence and “taste for adventure” that led to Joe joining him on a cross country bike trek and later to Joe moving to Pakistan, then Burundi and Ghana where he and his wife are now engaged in humanitarian aid.

Then I read Helen Coldwell Adams’ article about a family that, following the loss of the husband’s job, moved to Brazil to work with girls caught in the sex trade. What had been a devastating event — loss of a job — became the catalyst for examining other options.

The word that rang through my mind as I read these two articles was “significance.” I was impressed with the desire of these individuals to live lives that counted for something. That had purpose. Where they could best use their gifts.

It is easy in the business world to forget about things like significance and purpose. Business is about products and services and bottom lines. And while those things are important, I believe it equally can be about purpose and significance. And one doesn’t have to travel to Brazil, Pakistan or Afghanistan to make a significant difference in the lives of others.

Recently I was sitting with one of my coaching clients when he looked at me and stated passionately, “This is what I was really meant to do.” What he was referring to was his role in developing those around him. He had found what he believed was the most significant contribution he could make in life.

What about you? As you go about “taking care of business,” are you also making a positive difference in the lives of others? Are you willing to be a person of significance?

January 22, 2012

What’s the Big Deal about Culture? by Dennis Clemmer

At times you undoubtedly get tired of hearing us pound away at this organizational culture stuff. There are times when I, too, think maybe we overdo it. About the time I begin to think that, a story or two emerges that makes me realize just how important the culture of an organization is.

I, along with my wife, Fern, are part of a couples group that we affectionately call The Big Chill. (Many of us met at college, like the couples in the movie, “The Big Chill.”) The group has been together for over 35 years, and at the beginning of each year we go on a weekend retreat. It’s a time marked by fun, reflection, stimulating conversation and great food. During the course of the weekend we give each member of the group air time to talk about things that are important to them.

One of the members of our group, while visiting two different organizations, described overhearing employees at both places grumbling and complaining about issues they experienced in their workplace. (The employees were particularly free to discuss these issues because no one from the leadership group was around due to being off for the holidays.)

Another member of our group, engaged in important and meaningful work, shared that the toxicity within the organization where he works contributes to his frequently feeling drained and discouraged.

This got me thinking about the leadership in these organizations. Are the leaders unaware that people in their organizations experience their work life so negatively? Are they aware but don’t know what to do about it? Are they too busy working on their own agenda that they don’t take time to connect with their people and ask about how their work is going? Or do they just not care? The not caring I find hard to believe.

Susan Scott in her book, Fierce Conversations, uses a phrase she learned while working with a commercial fishing company, “The fish rots from the head.” How employees experience their workplace is the direct result of those providing primary leadership.

The creation of a vibrant culture does not occur accidently. It happens through intentionality—living out the organization’s core values, engaging employees in meaningful ways, consistently sharing important company information, providing resources for people to do good work, and affirming work well done. Rocket science it ain’t. Disciplined behavior it is.

So, what do you want your employees to say about their work experience when you aren’t around?

We welcome your comments at blog@northgroupconsultants.com.